THE SELF ESTEEM LOG THAT MOTIVATES

In my last Blog I said I would give some examples of my own Log of achievement: achievement that creates a body of evidence that persuades one’s own sub-conscious to believe that it is worthy, it is capable, and that beyond the negative good things happen even to me!

Before I delve – almost randomly – in my archives I ought to say that I think it is important in the first instance to re-frame the word ‘achievement’ itself. Unfortunately, in the sound-bite culture we live in, where notoriety is seen as a valid substitute for genuine recognition, people tend to discount real achievement. What I am trying to say is: first, achievement is simple; and second, may have little to do with the grandiose, sensational, and popular. Small things can be massive achievements: refraining from drinking coffee for the fourth day can seem pretty big if that is what one wants to achieve. Or, somebody saying, “Thank you. That was really helpful”, can be highly significant when your self-talk is running the message to yourself – ‘Oh, it was nothing, anybody could have done that’.

As a professional motivational mentor I frequently get the response from clients – asked to log three things a day or remember three achievements from yesterday – “I can’t think of anything I achieved”. This response is a sure sign of low self-esteem and a chronic inability to ‘see the object as it really is’. If we could see things as they really are, then we would re-gain that childlike vision; we would – paraphrasing William Blake – cleanse the doors of our perception. And the net effect of this would be: to be ourselves, which is to say that we would simply accept ourselves – our self esteem would be complete.

FROM THE ARCHIVES

The original Blog was written on the 3/9/08 – OK, what happened three years ago?

ARCHIVE 3/9/05

1. “PJ’s 30^th Birthday”               Achievement Summary Word: Pride

Commentary  – What does the above mean? PJ is my son by my first marriage, and simply, thirty years on I realize that no matter how badly that marriage turned out, I have a son of whom I am immensely proud – that feeling especially overwhelmed me on this particular day.

As an extra refinement, notice the Achievement Summary Word. This gets to the root of the achievement or the feeling that is good. Logging the one word over time has another advantage: you begin to see what values recur and are really important in your life.

2. “Complete one hour’s Tai Chi practice” Achievement Summary Word: Persistence

Commentary – I have been doing Tai Chi for a number of years. As anyone knows who practises any discipline or sport, it is keeping on keeping on that is the key to success and mastery. When we are busy we have all the excuses in the world not to do it; so we should log in that fact we did do it!

3. “Attend Colin and Liz’s BBQ” Achievement Summary Word: Friendship

Commentary – The fact of an invite, of an enjoyable afternoon, of friendship itself is a massive achievement in this rapidly changing world – so celebrate it!

ARCHIVE 3/9/07

1. “No coffee for 22 days”          Achievement Summary Word: Discipline

Commentary – I never quite crack my addiction to coffee, which I believe is not good for me. However, I have great runs at cracking it, and last year I felt compelled to log in how well I was doing.

2. “Acupuncture/Moxibustion session with Dr John”  – Achievement Summary Word: Health

Commentary – Obviously today I am really working and aware of my health and looking after myself: no coffee and a really relaxing and health-giving session with my Chinese acupuncturist, who is great.

3. “Agree in principle setup of new company with

Gary

” – Achievement Summary Word: Synergy

Commentary –

Gary

is a great friend of mine and over the last ten years we have worked ever more closely together. Today, as I speak, we own a company with Tim that specializes in developing Intellectual Property. This has been very exciting.

ARCHIVE 3/9/08

1.  “Time out with Linda to swim/steam”  – Achievement Summary Word: Together

Commentary – Linda, my wife, is the MD of our business. We are both busy. Thus, to find time during the day for us both to go to our club for a steam and swim – albeit briefly – is marvelous.

2.  “Re-negotiate deal with Steve” – Achievement Summary Word: Pro-active

Commentary – Steve and I have had a financial deal that has worked well for 18 months. We both independently realized this was not sustainable long term. We sat for an hour and hammered out a new deal – constructive and positive and what pleased me most: pro-active. Avoiding drifting on with a bad deal.

3. “Quaker welcome” – Achievement Summary Word: Growth

Commentary – I have been attending

Bournemouth

Quaker Meeting House for five years. Earlier this year I decided – was called? – to make a deeper commitment and actually join. As part of this process there is a formal welcome into the Community. (Another) Steve and Penny welcomed me in at Steve’s house where we stared into his beautiful garden. It was the culmination of five year’s growth and I was very happy.

Hopefully I have not been too verbose in unpacking this. But I have wanted to show what logging in achievement might look like, and how as a living record it supports the self-esteem and also becomes a means of increasing self-awareness and self-discovery.

I welcome others accounts of their use of logs or diaries or journals for this purpose and what their experience has been.

James